While I have not made the decision to cut my mother out of my life at this time, she has a major drinking problem...I had planned on going to her house last night so that she could see Boog in his costume but found out she was not "good" and decided not to go. Someone asked me why I would go over there...It's so that I can tell Boog when he asks questions, that yes, I tried to keep her in his life, and I will know that I'm not lying to my child...
My mother hasn't seen my son since July/August time frame and likely will not see him until Christmas...in some ways it makes me sad that he'll never know the person she could be, but I also like knowing that he won't see this person that she is...
DEAR ABBY: I have no contact with my mother for many reasons. It was difficult to sever the relationship, but after my son was born -- for his safety and well-being -- I felt I had no choice.
My mother has seen my son once, when he was 6 months old. She had just been released from jail and arrived at my home stoned and out of it. I made sure she found a safe way home and haven't spoken to her since.
My son will be 3 soon. Yesterday we were talking about families and he asked, "You don't have a mommy?" I replied, "Yes, I do. Her name is Cindy." Thankfully, he left it at that. But it started me thinking about what I should say when he asks me questions about his grandmother. I had planned on talking to him when he was older because addictions can run in families, and I want him to be aware of it when making choices in his teen and later years. What do you tell a 3-year-old who wonders who his grandma is? -- OUT OF ANSWERS IN WISCONSIN
DEAR OUT OF ANSWERS: You have already started the dialogue. When your son wants to know why Grandma Cindy doesn't visit, that will be the time you tell him she can't be around because she's sick and isn't able to be. As your son grows older, continue to answer his questions honestly and in an age-appropriate way.
No comments:
Post a Comment